I have had so many ideas and thoughts to write in the past several months, but struggle to find the time to write! I so long to encourage other moms because I know parenting is hard and sometimes feels lonely. This particular post has been hard to write because I'm making myself vulnerable. I want to be honest about my struggles in parenting in hopes that I may encourage at least one mom that may have the same struggles I have. So, I pray God will encourage you and strengthen you as a result of my honesty.
The laundry is constantly piled high and calling my name, toys all over the floor that I trip over daily, and more. Besides the daily chores, there are the very loud audible voices that constantly call out to me. Yes, that would be my children. I cannot leave them a lone for 5 minutes without someone getting hurt, it seems. How I love and adore them; how thankful I truly am for them, but oh, how I feel like I fail them every day. At the end of the day, I often wonder, have I accomplished anything today? I get down on myself so easily. The negative thoughts pressing in so heavily on a daily basis. "I can't believe you did ______" or "...didn't do (fill in the blank.)" I confess, I struggle with lots of insecurities.
As moms, we don't have someone giving us quarterly reviews on how we are doing. We don't have monetary or other extrinsic rewards to work towards earning. We don't have a coach telling us good job throughout our day. I don't know if you are like me, but I thrived on that kind of stuff back in school and when I was working before having children. So, how are we supposed to get through our day and feel like we've accomplished something and that we have done a good job? Well, perhaps we are not; perhaps that is the wrong perspective. Perhaps my perspective needs changing.
The past few weeks, I have been studying about Gideon in the book of Judges. Turns out Gideon and I have a lot in common. We are both insecure, afraid, and easily intimidated. God has been teaching me some things about Gideon's story that I can begin to apply to my parenting.
For starters, I will confess, I am very insecure in my parenting. Daily I feel like I fail my children and I feel like I fail God in raising them. God is teaching me that parenting is a battle and that it is vital to begin this "battle" each day in prayer. My "battle" is not against my children (even though sometimes it feels that way). Ephesians 6:12 explains, "For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms."
Have I learned this before? Yes! Do I need reminded often? Absolutely! I also know I still have much more to learn from the Lord. But, this is where I must start--in prayer. God has blessed me with this special role of parenting and He promises to not leave me stranded in it. I must fully rely on Him daily. I can also trust Him, that He will fill in the gaps when I mess up, that He will sustain me and strengthen me, and that He will show up in their lives too. Where I am weak, (i.e. parenting) He is strong!
Gideon also learned about God's strength in weakness in the book of Judges chapter 6. The Israelites were hiding from the Midianites in fear. In verse 11, we find a young man named, Gideon, busy threshing wheat and hiding it from the Midianites. Right then, where Gideon was hiding, God sent an angel to him and said, "The LORD is with you, mighty warrior!" Did you hear that? The angel called Gideon a "mighty warrior" while he was hiding in fear! If the Lord sent an angel to me and called me, "mighty warrior," I'd be looking all around me to see who He was talking to because it certainly would not be me! Listen to what the Lord says to Gideon next in verse 14:
"The Lord turned to him and said, 'Go in the strength you have and save Israel out of Midian’s hand. Am I not sending you?' 'Pardon me, my lord,' Gideon replied, 'but how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family.' The Lord answered, 'I will be with you, and you will strike down all the Midianites, leaving none alive.'" (Judges 6:14-16)
Gideon says, "how can I save Israel? My clan in the weakest...and I am the least." God, how can I teach these children to follow you and know your love for them? I am so weak! Then, I would go into all the reasons why I think I'm weak. But, God says to Gideon, "I will be with you..." and then God lets Gideon know they will win the battle!
Friend, this is true for both of us. No matter how much we may feel like we have failed, or messed up, no matter how tired we may be, we can trust God is with us! We can trust God to fill in the gaps and sustain us. At the end of the day, when the house is a wreck, the laundry still has not been done, you've lost count of how many times you put your preschooler in time-out, and you've just exhausted yourself--what matters is that we relied on Him. My perspective changes from focusing on what did not happen today to focusing on God's strength all day long and trusting Him to fill in the gaps. I am no super mom by any means. God is my strength, my helper, my sustainer, my filler. He will win this battle!
We cannot rely on ourselves. The slogan is not, "you got this," but instead:
God's. Got. This!
Monday, October 28, 2013
Wednesday, October 16, 2013
Question of the Week
Here is a an idea I came up with not too long ago. Each school year, I weekly attend a Bible study of some sort. Over the years, I have done Beth Moore, Bible Study Fellowship (BSF) and most recently one by Priscilla Shirer. Every time I leave from Bible Study, I am full of excitement over what God is teaching me and my brain is full of things I want to teach my children. But, I rarely ever get it out! I have a hard time applying what I learn. I feel as though I have so much to share with my family about what I am learning, but have a very difficult time finding time to share with them.
So, a while ago, I got an idea! I decided to come up with one question from my study that I can ask myself and my family. Then, I wrote the question on our dry erase board. This dry erase board is located right by the door where we enter and exit our home. It is where we keep the family calendars, school reminders, etc. So, we see this board often; it is hard to miss.
The first question I asked was, "Are you bringing honor to God in all that you do?" I can honestly tell you that I have seen this question and read it multiple times a day every day. Therefore, it has constantly been on my mind. I have been reminded to make sure that whatever I am doing is honoring to God AND I've at times remembered to ask my children, "are you bringing honor to God right now...are you making God happy with how you are acting" or "...in what you are doing?" Wow!
This has definitely impacted my own life. This first question changed my thinking at times and assisted me in discipling my children in a way that honors God, just by merely asking them the question and getting them to start thinking about it. It is amazing how one question can be made so simple for children and still be so deep for myself and my husband.
My second question was, "Are you walking with God?" Again this can be so simple for my kids and a good reminder for all of us. Yet, it can also be a deeper question that my husband and I can ponder over for the next week. For my children, "have you talked with God today?" "Have you listened to God today?" For myself, "have I spent time alone with the Lord--studying His word, praying and listening?"
At times, I have forgotten to write a new question and my kids will ask me, "Mom, where's our question this week?" I love that they love the idea and I love that they are helping keep me accountable!
Last week's question from my recent study about Gideon: "Who does God say you are?"
So, a while ago, I got an idea! I decided to come up with one question from my study that I can ask myself and my family. Then, I wrote the question on our dry erase board. This dry erase board is located right by the door where we enter and exit our home. It is where we keep the family calendars, school reminders, etc. So, we see this board often; it is hard to miss.
The first question I asked was, "Are you bringing honor to God in all that you do?" I can honestly tell you that I have seen this question and read it multiple times a day every day. Therefore, it has constantly been on my mind. I have been reminded to make sure that whatever I am doing is honoring to God AND I've at times remembered to ask my children, "are you bringing honor to God right now...are you making God happy with how you are acting" or "...in what you are doing?" Wow!
This has definitely impacted my own life. This first question changed my thinking at times and assisted me in discipling my children in a way that honors God, just by merely asking them the question and getting them to start thinking about it. It is amazing how one question can be made so simple for children and still be so deep for myself and my husband.
My second question was, "Are you walking with God?" Again this can be so simple for my kids and a good reminder for all of us. Yet, it can also be a deeper question that my husband and I can ponder over for the next week. For my children, "have you talked with God today?" "Have you listened to God today?" For myself, "have I spent time alone with the Lord--studying His word, praying and listening?"
At times, I have forgotten to write a new question and my kids will ask me, "Mom, where's our question this week?" I love that they love the idea and I love that they are helping keep me accountable!
Last week's question from my recent study about Gideon: "Who does God say you are?"
Thursday, January 24, 2013
How do I Show Love?
"Carry each other's burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ." Galatians 6:2 (NIV)
If you caught my New Year's blog, you saw my theme for the year is to "love God and love others" based on Matthew 22:37-39. My main goal this year is to not only do this myself, but teach my children to as well. The verse above, in Galatians, reminds me of the importance of loving others. Many of us know this verse, but perhaps are not sure how to "carry" each other's burdens.
I use to be at a loss for how to "carry" each other burdens as well. I knew I could always pray; however, which is very important. We can most certainly "carry" each other to the Lord in prayer. But what about being the "hands and feet" of Christ (1 Corinthians 12). 1 John 3:16-18 says,
"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth."
So, how? How do we love "with actions?" How do we act out love, carry each other's burden, and be the body of Christ? I want to encourage and challenge you to reach out to a hurting mom today, this week, this month. Who in your "world" could really use your help? Do you have someone in mind? Is there a single mom you know who could use your help? A mom of a child with cancer, a mom who's aging parents' health is struggling or passing away?
Then, ask, "how can I be the hands and feet of Christ for them?" One of the best things you can do is give them a call and let them know you care, that you are praying AND then ASK what they need. Sometimes we moms don't want to admit we need help and we certainly don't want to burden another mom with our problems. BUT, God created us for each other, to help each other. So, when a mom doesn't know what she needs, here are some ideas you can consider based on my own experience:
*Offer to cook a meal
*Offer to take their kids for an afternoon or a whole day, so mom can get a much needed nap (she may not realize how tired she is until the kids are gone).
*Bring a special treat: shortly after we lost our 6 year old nephew to cancer, we had some wonderful friends from church stop by with a bag of chocolate. There were no words to say, but just the effort to stop by and bring something special for our kiddos was such a blessing!
*Send a card letting them know you are praying. It's wonderful to pray, but oh so incredibly touching when you tell that person so they know you are praying.
*Clean their house!
*Take them out for a girl's night--take a mom out for dinner or just dessert. Go watch a funny movie or a chick-flick. Just get them out of the house. Sometimes changing their environment can make a world of difference. And a side note, girl's nights out are wonderful as long as they are positive and encouraging. This is not a time to pick on our spouses, or join a negative parade. This is a time to laugh, love, and encourage. Perhaps even a time to cry together.
*Offer to go to a doctor appointment with them.
*Donate, donate, donate: your clothes, your hair (for cancer) your time.
These are just a few ways to show Christ's love to moms who are hurting. I would love to hear any more ideas you have! Please comment so others can know more ways to help.
PS What brought me to this post? A friend and a sister who are both moms and going through some really hard times right now. And a sister-in-law who has suffered much. Here is the blog for my niece (my sister's daughter) if you would like to follow her story and pray. Thank you. :)
Taylor's Tumors
If you caught my New Year's blog, you saw my theme for the year is to "love God and love others" based on Matthew 22:37-39. My main goal this year is to not only do this myself, but teach my children to as well. The verse above, in Galatians, reminds me of the importance of loving others. Many of us know this verse, but perhaps are not sure how to "carry" each other's burdens.
I use to be at a loss for how to "carry" each other burdens as well. I knew I could always pray; however, which is very important. We can most certainly "carry" each other to the Lord in prayer. But what about being the "hands and feet" of Christ (1 Corinthians 12). 1 John 3:16-18 says,
"This is how we know what love is: Jesus Christ laid down his life for us. And we ought to lay down our lives for our brothers and sisters. If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person? Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth."
So, how? How do we love "with actions?" How do we act out love, carry each other's burden, and be the body of Christ? I want to encourage and challenge you to reach out to a hurting mom today, this week, this month. Who in your "world" could really use your help? Do you have someone in mind? Is there a single mom you know who could use your help? A mom of a child with cancer, a mom who's aging parents' health is struggling or passing away?
Then, ask, "how can I be the hands and feet of Christ for them?" One of the best things you can do is give them a call and let them know you care, that you are praying AND then ASK what they need. Sometimes we moms don't want to admit we need help and we certainly don't want to burden another mom with our problems. BUT, God created us for each other, to help each other. So, when a mom doesn't know what she needs, here are some ideas you can consider based on my own experience:
*Offer to cook a meal
*Offer to take their kids for an afternoon or a whole day, so mom can get a much needed nap (she may not realize how tired she is until the kids are gone).
*Bring a special treat: shortly after we lost our 6 year old nephew to cancer, we had some wonderful friends from church stop by with a bag of chocolate. There were no words to say, but just the effort to stop by and bring something special for our kiddos was such a blessing!
*Send a card letting them know you are praying. It's wonderful to pray, but oh so incredibly touching when you tell that person so they know you are praying.
*Clean their house!
*Take them out for a girl's night--take a mom out for dinner or just dessert. Go watch a funny movie or a chick-flick. Just get them out of the house. Sometimes changing their environment can make a world of difference. And a side note, girl's nights out are wonderful as long as they are positive and encouraging. This is not a time to pick on our spouses, or join a negative parade. This is a time to laugh, love, and encourage. Perhaps even a time to cry together.
*Offer to go to a doctor appointment with them.
*Donate, donate, donate: your clothes, your hair (for cancer) your time.
These are just a few ways to show Christ's love to moms who are hurting. I would love to hear any more ideas you have! Please comment so others can know more ways to help.
PS What brought me to this post? A friend and a sister who are both moms and going through some really hard times right now. And a sister-in-law who has suffered much. Here is the blog for my niece (my sister's daughter) if you would like to follow her story and pray. Thank you. :)
Taylor's Tumors
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)